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witchscauldronI'm letting out some old jeans - a)because I don't wear my pants the same way I did in high school, and b)I last wore these jeans in Gr.10. O_o No...seriously. I wear them pulled up higher on the waist now, rather than closer to my hips like I used to. Makes me wonder what I was thinking. It's nice, though, to know you can let something out a couple of inches and wear them like they're new, as opposed to fighting and crying because they won't even come up over your hips anymore. New from old...
I wish I felt like celebrating the Sabbats again. Mabon is my favorite. I haven't felt like doing ritual to mark, well, anything, in forever. It's just strange. I do tend my altars during the day, offer incense, light candles...I just can't seem to raise the interest or energy to celebrate on my own. :\
It's a symptom of the city, I think. I want to go outside! It's just very...cramped feeling, tucked into my altar corner of the bedroom. No space = Unhappy Heather. I still have to talk to my Mom again - I never did find out if she found that pattern I sent her off after. I still feel dead - it's like the ghosts of a past life are crawling all over my skin and I just want to peel it off.
It got so humid last night...this feckin' weather SUCKS. I had to turn the air conditioner on to get some sleep. O_o This isn't fall. 27 Celcius and thunderstorms might make me happy in...oh, MAY. I like a good storm, but...It's September. Bring on the cold, dammit!! Where's my sweater weather? Where's the delicate curl of frost on fallen leaves? Where's FALL? It's supposed to be official on Sunday - let's hope it can pull it out by then.
Making cookies this weekend. Oak and maple leaves. :) Haven't decided whether or not to ice them in pretty colours, or cover them in sparkle-sugar in pretty colours. Whatever I decide to do will be ok, I'm sure. Pretty is fun. Maybe that'll be my Mabon celebration. Maybe I'll make cookies and have a nice quiet talk with my Gods.
Maybe I need a good long hike in the woods somewhere. Like out behind Aunt Nancy's in the nice tall maples and birch, out to the lakeshore. That would be nice. Or even just to the dock at Grandpa's, provided the dock spiders don't scare the bejesus out of me. I would love to go to Foley Mountain, by Westport, and have a nice solid climb - good exercise, beautiful leaves. I would LOVE to get on a horse. A ride would just make me explode with delight. But I can't. :\ The memory, though, of creaking leather, the earthy smell of horse, the feeling of power and grace beneath me...I could weep.
So many memories ride on a cool breeze filled with woodsmoke and the promise of Winter...too many, maybe.
I wish I felt like celebrating the Sabbats again. Mabon is my favorite. I haven't felt like doing ritual to mark, well, anything, in forever. It's just strange. I do tend my altars during the day, offer incense, light candles...I just can't seem to raise the interest or energy to celebrate on my own. :\
It's a symptom of the city, I think. I want to go outside! It's just very...cramped feeling, tucked into my altar corner of the bedroom. No space = Unhappy Heather. I still have to talk to my Mom again - I never did find out if she found that pattern I sent her off after. I still feel dead - it's like the ghosts of a past life are crawling all over my skin and I just want to peel it off.
It got so humid last night...this feckin' weather SUCKS. I had to turn the air conditioner on to get some sleep. O_o This isn't fall. 27 Celcius and thunderstorms might make me happy in...oh, MAY. I like a good storm, but...It's September. Bring on the cold, dammit!! Where's my sweater weather? Where's the delicate curl of frost on fallen leaves? Where's FALL? It's supposed to be official on Sunday - let's hope it can pull it out by then.
Making cookies this weekend. Oak and maple leaves. :) Haven't decided whether or not to ice them in pretty colours, or cover them in sparkle-sugar in pretty colours. Whatever I decide to do will be ok, I'm sure. Pretty is fun. Maybe that'll be my Mabon celebration. Maybe I'll make cookies and have a nice quiet talk with my Gods.
Maybe I need a good long hike in the woods somewhere. Like out behind Aunt Nancy's in the nice tall maples and birch, out to the lakeshore. That would be nice. Or even just to the dock at Grandpa's, provided the dock spiders don't scare the bejesus out of me. I would love to go to Foley Mountain, by Westport, and have a nice solid climb - good exercise, beautiful leaves. I would LOVE to get on a horse. A ride would just make me explode with delight. But I can't. :\ The memory, though, of creaking leather, the earthy smell of horse, the feeling of power and grace beneath me...I could weep.
So many memories ride on a cool breeze filled with woodsmoke and the promise of Winter...too many, maybe.
